Yay Venice. The best and whackiest place in the world. We went to see the Biennale which was an over whelming amount of artistic stimulation to absorb in one go and reinforced my philistine attitude to art. Most of it was childish, trite contrived bull shit. My truly artistic friends (Shelley Watson springs to mind) will be gnashing their teeth at such an opportunity being wasted on me. Spain’s exhibit was piles of meticulously sifted and sorted dirt. And that was one of the less affected ones. Hackneyed, clichéd 6th form art folder stuff. Bah humbug.

That is my two cents worth. Most of it was cool. Here’s the Spanish dirt in case you thought I was making it up.

The British exhibit was breathtaking. The Australian one was dum. The NZ one was eyewateringly dull, and frustrating. It could have been an installation from a Westfeild Mall. And its not that I am particularly mean spirited or jaded (or in any way well informed about art) because I thought the Michael Parakowhai exhibit last time was mind-blowingly good and made me want to stand up and sing the National Anthem on the Grand Canal.

Venice – what a thoroughly choice place. It suits me entirely. Its all about stumbling about looking at lovely old things and eating and drinking. There isn’t even a need to be careful in traffic. We stayed in a place we’ve stayed before which is perfect. We had an attic room this time with a rooftop / Cave Creek style balcony that the children weren’t allowed onto.

And just to shake things up a bit, so it didn’t get boring they held a regatta. On a perfect cloudless day, only marred by a Russian oligarch buzzing the canal in his chopper, they rowed past a variety of small, local boats and old, enormous traditional historic barges. And there were bands playing, and choirs of retired gondoliers singing and elderly nuns on folding chairs. What a lovely day. And then there were rowing races between the local suburb’s boats – perhaps a precursor to our corporate dragon boat race teams, but with loads more velvet and gold trim, and more nuns cheering.